Short Story: The Lonely Princess

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About this Short Story

Written by
Tom Hitchen

My attempt at writing for small children. Isabelle is the youngest daughter of King Geoffrey, and the least pretty. With a young Prince visiting soon, her older sisters shun her, making her the Lonely Princess.

  • 484 Words
  • 77% Community Rating

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Once upon a time, in the Kingdom of Glora, lived a young princess, the king’s youngest daughter. Her name was Isabelle and she was the sweetest girl in the entire kingdom, more playful, funny and adorable than her older sisters, Juliette and Rose.

Rose was amazingly beautiful, the only prettier girl in the kingdom was her older sister Juliette. But, as beautiful as they were, they were cruel. They would tease Isabelle, calling her ugly and saying she should stop playing with her toys and brush her hair more instead.

Isabelle ignored them. She loved playing with her dolls, hosting tea parties and dances in the palace gardens. Her dolls never called her names or told her what to do, they loved her and they were her best friends. Even with the dolls, thought, Isabelle was lonely.

The King, Geoffrey, hated seeing his youngest and favourite daughter so upset. He spent as much time with Isabelle as he could, but his duties to…

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Belinda Marden said "I loved reading this book and I'm glad it was the first one I read on this website. It literally made me want to sign up so that is what I did. Thank you :) It was a wonderful read."
2 years ago
Sara Martins said "Hi I just think that the story hasn't ended yet. There is something missing like "from that day on they become best friends" or got married or something like that. When I read to my daughters (5 and 3) I give some emphasis but when the stories end like this they just look at me and ask: so? what happened? They went to the garden and?? Sorry for the bad english as it is not my primary language Regards"
3 years ago
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Adam West Guest Editor said "That's sweet Tom - Prince of Meadowhill made me smile, too - surprised he didn't come armed with bunch of shopping bags :-) -charming story I imagine my kids would have loved, especially my daughter, quite a long time ago...many thanks, Adam"
4 years ago
Tom Hitchen replied saying "Thanks Adam :-) glad you enjoyed."
4 years ago
Alex Mason said "Writing for children is always hard, as many of the rules that govern adult fiction writing simply do not apply; in this regard however, I feel this story ticks most of the boxes. It is simple in structure, elegantly written and with a powerful message that is expressed in a succinct manner. My slight issue is the focus on morality over fun thoughout; whilst the story is good, its quite obviously teaching kids that appearance is not as important as simply being yourself, i feel that this message is given a little bit too strongly. I admit to not being a parent, but whenever i read children stories to the next generation, i find the best stories are ones that go a little bit offbeat and focus less on education. The story structure is a well trodden one; princess, love of her father, nasty sisters, prince who sees through the nasty sisters, etc. This is not a problem per say, children in my experience don't really mind if something is not utterly original; but the lack of originality also means that it makes a good, strong imaginative element for the child to latch upon. Its no great secret that the more fantastical you make a story the more some kids will like it - the sheer success of the gruffalo et al is testament to that. My major fear with this story is that, whilst well written and well meaning, is simply lacking that imagination factor that would transform it from good and well written to amazing and brilliant. In short: when in doubt, add monsters."
4 years ago
Tom Hitchen replied saying "I know exactly what you mean and, were I allowed more than 500 words, I would have made something more original. However, within such a word limit there simply would not have been words to introduce any new or original characters, hence I went with stereotypes every child knows and most love. Simple is best when writing flash."
4 years ago

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